Fuck I’m So Sad

Fuck I’m so sad

Tiny flame dwindling

Like a frown at the edge of space-time

On the ledge of space-time

Where I can see the whole universe

Arranged in columns of stars

And light sparks between clouds

Of nebulous gas

Giving rise to creation

Creating this feeling

Of divine isolation

In the cold and the dark

Where the orbs spin

And distant flames dwindle

And twinkle

As though it’s the same thing

The sane thing

To be distracted by light

Like moths swarming a bulb

Seeking warmth / Seeking death

In the sizzling caress

Of the flame and the glass

Like a glass window pane

The pain is ingrained in me

It goes on and on

Like some old song

Cobbled together

From all I’ve done wrong

And from old nursery rhymes

Rhyming slang / Guitar twang

The phone rang

In my memories like a harpy

Yet I cannot sink

Cannot think

In this darkness





A bubble escapes from my lips

As I gasp

What is this?

My body suspended

In a body of water

Suspended in space

My heart’s starting to race

And my thoughts can’t keep pace

With the weight of disgrace

And my shoes are unlaced

What I’m trying to say is

I’m trying to stay


On the earth

And its tectonic plates

Rocky pinnacle untouched

And ever unseen

So remains like a dream

Long forgotten

Long turned rotten

In the back of my mind

Like a miner

Pickaxe striking at

My amygdala

Wounded snake

Driven mad

Rising up now and biting

Not because I am angry

But because I am frightened

Of men and their nets

And the battles they’re fighting

Lightning upon the plains

Scorches whole fields with blame

I’m so lame

I’m so lame

And fuck I’m so scared

Wish I’d been prepared

For this